Obligation
Everyone has things that they are obliged to do in their lives. Literally no one is free from this burden. Even babies are obliged to do things like consume food and move around in order to grow to the point they are functional enough to take on more responsibilities. One day they are lying on their backs being force fed milk, the next thing they know they are working a 9 to 5 in order to pay their own bills.
This is not meant to be a bleak outlook on life. It’s just a statement that no matter what you do or where you are in your life, you’ve got stuff that you are obliged to do. Even the incredibly wealthy have to get up in the morning and brush their teeth, just like everyone else.
I was riding a train last week and thought to myself about the obligations in my life. I have been quite busy recently and I will be even busier in November. I had been invited to be part of an iaidō demonstration in the middle of November and I was thinking to myself whether I wanted to agree to it or not. Do I really want another thing I’m obliged to do? This got me thinking.
The obligations we choose
A typical week for me involves me working, running, and doing martial arts. I also write an article for Substack every week as well, which ends up being another obligation of mine.
When I think about that list of things I need to do, there is literally only one thing that is a true obligation. That would be work. All the running, martial arts, and writing are obligations I place on myself. I choose to do a lot of things and if I REALLY wanted to, I could stop at any point. But over the years I’ve found that treating things like running, martial arts, and writing as obligations ends up working out quite well for me. I don’t need to run myself into the ground with these things…but I do need to show up.
Showing up
When I was young I liked martial arts a lot because if I showed up to a class I would be told what I needed to do in order to get a good work out in and learn some skills. It didn’t matter how I felt or how tired I was, if I was at a class and I was told to punch, I’d punch. Now, that seems like a bit of a lazy, low effort approach to discipline, but it works.
The vast majority of my classes were not autopilot zombie like activities, because I did (and do) genuinely enjoy training. But there were times when just showing up and doing my best to at least go through the motions kept the momentum going and were all worth it in the end. One of the most amusing examples of this was when I was at university I went to a pub crawl with my tae kwon do friends, and pretty much everyone over indulged on that evening. The next day there was a morning training session and most of the dedicated students staggered in to shake out the night before. Our instructors gave everyone an absolute beast of a workout leaving the training hall smelling like a brewery. At least 5 people needed to excuse themselves from training with temporary stomach issues, but I think everyone learned a lesson that day.
When I was younger I knew there was value in turning up to class and at the very least going through the motions. And after years of (at minimum) going through the motions, I realize there is a lot of value in it.
Going through the motions
If you want to be good at something you need to have a good amount of focused training. You can’t become elite if you half ass it all the time. But someone who consistently half asses it might end up being significantly better than someone who just does one incredibly focused training session a week (in some areas).
Picture two runners:
Gets up early on Sunday and runs 10 km as hard as they can every week.
Gets up every day and runs 5 km with a speed based on how they are feeling.
In my opinion, runner number 2 is likely to be the better runner.
Runner number 1 gets one training session a week where they intend to run 10 km as hard as they can. They might do well some weeks, and not so well other weeks. It depends on their condition.
Runner number 2 can take it easy on some days (just going through the motions) and go harder on other days depending on their physical condition. they will run 35 km a week and will likely improve gradually over time.
I appreciate when people show up but I have noticed different attitudes about this.
Don’t give people who show up a hard time
People in Japan are (in general) very punctual for the important things in life. If there is a work meeting, a ceremony, or a train/flight connection, most people will be on time for it. Those are the REAL obligations in life.
But when it comes to things that are non-essential (what would be consider extracurricular activities), a lot of people are quite forgiving if someone shows up late. If class starts at 19:30 and someone walks in at 20:00, the general attitude is that that person was held up at work, but we are happy that they made the effort to show up despite being held up at work.
When I lived in England the attitude was a little bit different. People who showed up late to a martial arts class were sometimes punished for being late and I even remember an instructor saying to someone that if they are going to be late then they just shouldn’t come. This to me was a bit of a toxic, micromanaging attitude. If I’m being paid to be here then you can take that tone with me, but if I’m spending money and taking time and energy away from my life to join a martial arts class then what right do you have to get angry with me if I miss 30 minutes of a warm up in a two hour class?
I prefer the Japanese attitude to this. Classes are there for the benefit of people who want to take them. If someone is late, they are the only person who loses out. An instructor is not harmed by a student being 30 minutes late because they got held up at the office.
I invited one of my karate juniors to my sprint sessions recently. Last Saturday he mentioned to me that he would come along on Sunday morning, but when Sunday rolled around he didn’t show up. Half way through the session he showed up and said he got lost on the way. I was actually really happy to see that he made the effort to show up, and didn’t give up despite having difficulties on the way over.
I hope he shows up to these sessions more.
Final thoughts and take home messages
If you are a living, breathing human being you have some form of obligation that you need to take care of. The older you get, the more that looks like work, but no matter what age you are, you’ve got stuff to do. (Hope you finished your homework).
Some of us choose to burden ourselves with additional obligations. Those things help develop us in the long run, but we might not always have the motivation to put in 110%.
Showing up matters. Showing up and having a low key, minimalist session is far superior to having no session at all. Don’t listen to people who will give you a hard time for showing up.
Real obligations are of course the most important. But sometimes treating our extracurricular activities like they are unavoidable obligations can be good for us.*
*I’ll perform at that demo I mentioned in the first paragraph.
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Osu!
Anthony, I don't run, do martial arts, or live in Japan, so I'm not sure how I found your Substack some several months ago. But I am glad I did. You have a contemplative, direct way of thinking (and writing) that is very refreshing and your obvious dedication to your various pursuits is admirable.
Today's article resonates especially with me. Thanks!
Thank you Anthony.